is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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