I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Randomize
