I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
i came on her dog
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Randomize