Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
Is Oprah even human
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs