TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.