so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
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