all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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