I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Randomize
