Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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