I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
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