i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
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