if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
Randomize