I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
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