It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
You were trust falling into bushes
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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