Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
there was a trapeze. enough said
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize
