As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
I want her autograph on my taint
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Randomize
