East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
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