somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
Randomize
