It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
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I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
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I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
It was a blind-side dick pic.
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
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