mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
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So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
it's like iHOP with fire
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
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