Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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