I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
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