I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Randomize