I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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