I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Randomize