New invention idea: vibrating tampons
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Randomize
