what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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