GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
