Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
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