This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
Say something about gay babies.
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
