yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
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