dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
