Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
even my farts smell like vagina
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
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