If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Randomize
