But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Randomize
