what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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