escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Randomize