Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
I have feelings that need drinking.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
Got wasted in a little tiki hut by the beach yesterday. Woke up with a coconut and half of a mushroom burger in my purse. I also have a picture of our Romanian bartender's fingernails on my phone lol
Why do you always wake up with meat in your purse?
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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