Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
Randomize
