We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
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I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
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It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
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