if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
