What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
