Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Randomize
