How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
He had one of those small greek statue penises
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
I have already put on my inside pants.
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
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