he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
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tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
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nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
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