Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
I'm so stoned I just sat here for like at least 45 min thinking about how I would get some jack in the box tacos if only I knew where my wallet was and then I kind of blinked and finally noticed I had literally been staring at my wallet the ENTIRE fucking time
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
You left your phone here
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