i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize
