he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
