I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
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