If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Randomize
