But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
Randomize
