oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Randomize
