Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
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